I will if you will

I will walk amongst the flame
if you choose to do the same
I will keep the pain alive
if you do not let it die
I will be your tragedy
if you be my agony
I will be an apparition
if you remain my ghostly mission
If you be what I can't have
than I will stay beyond your grasp.

Until It Breaks

Thriving where the chaos reigns
to avoid every shortcoming
you think I may be crazy
but know exactly what this brings
three hundred sixty degrees
spins me back to the beginning
never looked at normalcy
as something that was appealing
Maybe I'm delusional
for holding to this spectacle
or maybe I'm too critical
of which direction I should go
I guess I'm just skeptical
of ever really feeling whole
a life of mediocrity
just don't seem that rewarding
watching it dwindling away
there is nothing you can say
to try and make me change my ways
this existence I chose holds no escape

pushing the boundary until it breaks.
to see how much I take.

Justify My Anger

Justify my anger
make the reason pure
looking past the danger
letting emotions stir
establish my fury
add fuel to the flame
burn away the worry
that buries the untamed
warrant my frustration
burrow through the blur
in every stimulation
of all that we once were.
absolve my outrage
with a reason to blame
in every war I wage
and every game I play

Endangered

Birthed into a world
where sanity is complacent numbness
Birthed into a world
where life, freedom, and innocence
is too expensive for the masses
Born into humanity
that has forgotten itself
a generation of weak hands
losing grip of instinct
losing grip of feeling
losing grip of morality
losing touch
letting go.
to reach for the god that does not answer them
to reach for the next drink
the next pill
the next product
and most of all more money
A television screen is a parent
which we depend on to watch our children
and cry afoul when they learn too much from it
Educating our adolescent
only enough to depend on a society
that may not even be there when they grow up
teaching them to follow jesters as kings
a false throne
The youngest and brightest sent to die
for the old and greedy
Where a bright colorful lure is waved in front of their eyes
where true patriotism is terrorism
where the many are separated, and the few are strong
where people are simply commodities
where the self-thinkers are outcasts
where the opinionated are slandered
A virus, infecting all elements of mother earth
a dying organism ravaging its immune system.

Born into a world, that I was counted out of,
before I could make the choice to resign.

Dying Breed

These words that you read, are thrown from my soul.
These words that I need, so I don't lose control.

How many more loads, until they break my back?
These feelings explode, can't tell whats fake or fact.

Now shall we proceed, to be a dying breed?
All of these warnings, that we do not take heed.

Deliberation is not of your concern.
Wrong destination, you have missed your turn.

I see the demons, have overthrown the throne.
The fallen angels, with nowhere to call home.

Is there no heaven? Is there no hell?
Where I have headed, it seems in both I've dwelled.

Look into my eyes, can't you tell?
They may seem empty, but it's just a cell.

What they have withheld, I wish I could share.
circumstances I have befell, I fear you would not care.

Now shall I proceed, to be a dying breed?
All of these warnings, that I do not take heed.

Drama Queens

Making something
out of nothings
always clouded, by your assumptions
Miscreated forms of hatred
towards the ones who cause your tiny problems

Making moves to purposely prove
bad impressions where all of us lose

Making something
out of nothings
well aware of the problems they bring
Articulated forms of hatred
for the ones who have no way to solve them

They ignore and yet you wonder why
they are tired of being your fall guy

Ran out of whipping boys
targets and victims
suspects to put your words in verbatim
suckers and scapegoats
to pin on your quotes

The words that you spoke have become a joke.

Don't Bother

Do you ever feel like your dying?
Is there no sense in me trying?
Voices that I keep denying,
Their advice I'm just not buying.

The fire smolders as I grow older
The Lines on my face growing bolder.
She wants to cry on my shoulder,
but where is she when I need to hold her?

Don't Bother

Indecision is ringing clear,
echoing throughout my ears.
Everything that I hold dear,
always seems to disappear.

Is all that I do in vain?
Always hearing them complain.
Trying all I can to stay sane
No medicine can kill this migraine.

Don't Bother

They depend on me to heal.
Always hearing them reveal.
What about what I conceal?
What about the way I feel?

My compassion starts to waver,
flavors of the past I savor.
Waiting here for my life saver.
Someone please return the favor.

Don't Bother

Dominant Goals

The lies
and agendas
Who took the shots?
The ties
they defend just
to take what you got

Few seem to know
those dominant goals
or do you ignore your loss of control?

Whats going on?
something is wrong

Few face the facts
that our wars will leave tracks
to know it all comes back
in a homeland attack
Those who control the money
only have to achieve
but the will of the people
and make them believe
which gives them total power
while the others only bleed
while living in poverty to make what you need.

They try
to pretend
your not on the spot
They spy
and amend
to tie you in knots

Few seem to know
those dominant goals
or do you ignore your loss of control?

Whats going on?
something is wrong

Disenchanted

I walk amongst the disenchanted

those with eyes that do not see
ears that do not hear
tongues that do not taste
and hands that do not feel

they are blind to my visions
my words they do not listen
spit out the flavors I create
numb to my touch

I walk amongst the disenchanted
detached
desensitized
demoralized and degraded
where nothing is special, and everything's jaded

everything has been seen
everything has been heard
everything has bee tasted
and everyone has been had

So say I am trapped in illusion. . . .I am glad

Coincide

Rubble, blood and tears
collect from our fears
of inability to coincide
A struggle always appears
throughout all these years
hostilities when our worlds collide
From nation to nation
to person to person
relationships worsen
for the devils den is where we are stationed
If you can not think for yourself
you can help no one else
for it is not for wealth, or power, but health
If we only took a deep look inside
we would see were the same
this world is of which we came
whether color
or gender
or creed, race
or god
We are all still peas in the same fucking pod
so look at yourself, and look at each other
would you jump so quickly to kill a sister or brother?

Bottled Up

Entrapped and Restrained,
    Enclosed inside my veins.
So nauseous  its sickening,
    this monstrous contradicting.
So hollow the bottle,
    and let out your sorrow.
No matter how much you swallow,
   it is still unforgotten tomorrow.
These are not the bottles to empty I seek,
    but I know that they render my defenses weak.
The defenses that,  I work to get past,
   stranded inside a small shell made of glass.
Does anyone truly know who I am?
    Including myself, as of now, where I stand?
The bottle I seek is inside.
    buried deep with the ego and pride.

as long as the bottle is full, that is where all of which things will lie.

Armor

This armor I wear
once used to shine with brilliance
but the years of battles have taken their toll
internal decadence has made it dull
battered, and dented, full of holes
across my breastplate, my heart is exposed
the others know this weakness
for they strike it again and again
but I have yet to falter

This armor I wear
has seen its times of war and peace
surprise skirmishes on empty streets
overbearing, obese police
stabs in the back, and frontal attacks
sweet victory, and bitter defeat
In my head the battles repeat
over and over
it prepares me for the next wave

it has been molded around me
I can not take it off
I wish I could
for you

Agnostic

I have been dreaming of rapture for so long
and not making it here, but when I'm gone
repeating the longest of sad songs
a paradise gone wrong

Heaven? Heaven can wait
while I try to make a cleaner slate

Dream of a warmth not remembered
a December that lasts forever
am I too numb to know if I get there?
set me free from this temper

Heaven? Heaven can wait
while I try to make a cleaner slate

Cling to a fury that helps me form
a silent calm right before the storm
These clouds that separate me from the norm
demons I can not reform

Heaven? Heaven can wait
while I try to make a cleaner slate

A childhood vision that's shattered
from a day when all of it mattered
a consultation that man has torn and tattered
misread words fill empty heads

Heaven? Heaven can wait
while I try to make a cleaner slate

God please don't tell me its too late.

Be My Affliction

Be my problem
be my mistake
be the reason for my heart break
Be my headache
my nervous wreck
be the source of my neglect
Be my hurt
be my pain
be my reason to complain
Be my madness
be my sadness
be my past, be my missed chances
Be my disgust
my misplaced trust
be my love that was unjust

Don't be these things
  Hold on, wait.
already are
   it is too late.

Shrouded Obscurity

If you keep running from the truth
than it is lies that you pursue
continue holding to the wrong
and the right eventually moves on
turning your back to what you see
is blinding you from everything
closed ears incapable of hearing
the echos of what you are dreaming
every ruse that you peruse
confuses all that you could lose
saturating your being
losing honesty and meaning
concealing every feeling
never reveals serenity

Self Destruct

Tearing myself away
from their moral decay
walking the avenue
along  those without a clue
the joggers seek life preservation
while I seek out life destruction
following crossroad junctions
where true sense no longer functions
past the gyms lined with weight benches
while I walk along gutters and trenches
I would rather have nothing
than what they see as something
postponing the inevitable
immortal hopes inside their skulls 
give me death to know I'm alive
not life to know that I will die.

Satans Necktie

what is normalcy?
what is irrational?
vagrant wanderers
somewhere in between the two
dwelling outside of belonging
unknown is the existence
beyond mortal borders
what boundaries do the mind have
with infinite perception?
is eternity truly perpetual?
obedience
is suicide of the soul
stifled evolution
in a world of conservative illusion
and elaborate enchantment
lost are the keys to the kingdom
utopia ravaged, raped
by the highest bidder
and sold back
to the spiritually disconnected children
of a forgotten age
in a plastic package